Somehow, Christmas will get under your skin

My sister said last week she’s having trouble getting into Christmas this year. I don’t blame her. It comes so fast and feels so aggressive that you wonder sometimes if anyone out there remembers why we celebrate.

We’re pushed from pillar to post each holiday season, with ad campaigns that begin before Halloween and a hard sell from Nov. 1 on. I can understand why a person would be ‘jingled-out’, fed up and frankly disenchanted with the whole thing.

But I didn’t go there. Instead, I thought back to when I’ve experienced loss or was at loose ends, when Christmas dinner was a peanut butter sandwich and a stale cup of coffee, a quiet room with a tabletop tree and a handful of decorations on it.

I struggled hard to find purpose in this kind of Christmas, where my family was as close as the phone but actually a couple of thousand miles away and the steady tick of the clock was a solemn reminder that this particular Christmas, compared to all others, would be different.

I pondered this for a good while before I responded to her e-mail. When I finally clicked Reply and started writing, here’s what I said.

First, don’t panic. We have a tendency at this time of year to think in absolutes, to imagine the best and worst in Technicolor. Take it easy and don’t expect too much: of yourself or anyone else.

Next, allow the moment. I’ve found over the years that Christmas will, indeed, happen. It may not conform to the traditional paradigm, but it will occur and lift the spirits as surely as children dream of Santa on Christmas Eve.

There will be a time – who knows how – when wonderment takes over. It could involve something as simple as a person returning the wallet that slips out of your pocket as you cross the street or a spontaneous hug from a niece or nephew when you decide to visit.

It will surprise and jar you because of its unexpected nature, and then drill beneath whatever crust has fashioned around your soul and crack it wide open.

The feeling may start with a smile, but its warmth will become viral before long. I’m sure it sounds hokey and you probably think I’m nuts, but it’s the truth.

I wish I could elaborate on the cosmology, but it’s beyond me. What I do know is, for whatever reason, Christmas will come. It may not be wrapped in a bow or tucked beneath a tree, nor will it be captured in a carol or couched in familiar trappings.

It might be a glance, a word or a gesture that sparks an epiphany, and then the essence will be revealed as surely as a star ignited the heavens two millennia ago and the world changed forevermore.

Wait for it, I said. It’ll happen. Don’t know why, can’t say when. But I’ve felt the dissonance, heard the whispers of an empty room, and somehow managed to find Christmas.

Don’t worry if you can’t get into it this year. It’s normal and not without precedent.

Keep in mind, though, as unbelievable as it seems, Christmas will somehow get into you. I can’t explain it, but be prepared, my friends, and recognize it when it happens. The rewards are tremendous.

May you have a safe and happy holiday. All the best, from me to you. Merry Christmas.